"even when you know the way it's gonna go... it's hard, to get around the wind"

hi dear ones, 

i'm confused by february almost being over. it's simultaneously a relief and also brings up its own feelings. special huge thank you to the lovely Ruthie Rosenberg for making this happen.

1) first off, put this song on... much gratitude to Sam and Tricia for introducing me to this awesome movie called Submarine. the entire soundtrack is by Alex Turner. this one is called "It's Hard to Get Around the Wind." it has been a huge comfort to me for the last couple weeks.

2) secondly, "Sweet Darkness" by David Whyte - full of february wisdom.

Sweet Darkness

When your eyes are tired
the world is tired also.

When your vision has gone
no part of the world can find you.

Time to go into the dark
where the night has eyes
to recognize its own.

There you can be sure
you are not beyond love.

The dark will be your womb
tonight.

The night will give you a horizon
further than you can see.

You must learn one thing.
The world was made to be free in.

Give up all the other worlds
except the one to which you belong.

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn

anything or anyone
that does not bring you alive

is too small for you.

3) another poem, because, well, it's me... this one, my dear Anastasia Aguiar shared with me in 2010. maybe before? i can literally hear her reciting it in Rick Benjamin's class. she once considered sharing it at a memorial for my mom, and since then, i have found myself coming back to it over and over. 

"from within, of self-blessing".... mmmm. 

Saint Francis and the Sow by Galway Kinnell

The bud

stands for all things,

even for those things that don’t flower,

for everything flowers, from within, of self-blessing;   

though sometimes it is necessary

to reteach a thing its loveliness,

to put a hand on its brow

of the flower

and retell it in words and in touch

it is lovely

until it flowers again from within, of self-blessing;   

as Saint Francis

put his hand on the creased forehead

of the sow, and told her in words and in touch   

blessings of earth on the sow, and the sow   

began remembering all down her thick length,   

from the earthen snout all the way

through the fodder and slops to the spiritual curl of the tail,   

from the hard spininess spiked out from the spine   

down through the great broken heart

to the sheer blue milken dreaminess spurting and shuddering   

from the fourteen teats into the fourteen mouths sucking and blowing beneath them:

the long, perfect loveliness of sow.

4) Last, for now, the NYC subways experiment!

which will make you smile. file under "random acts of silliness and kindness"

i love you all very much. 

thank you for this and for everything.

thank you for showing up.

love always,

einat