Since moving back to the US in May, I've been doing this exercise thing called Gyrotonic. It simultaneously feels like I'm in a cult of professional dancers and wealthy women over 60, like I am stretching and releasing muscles I did not know I had, and like I am healing my heart by moving my body. I would love to talk about it more. For now, though, I'm telling you this so that I can tell you that at the end of the session today, my instructor said, "We're done. I can finally say it. You've crossed a threshold." Last week, I felt like I had unlearned absolutely everything. Nothing was feeling natural and I was overthinking all the movements and getting frustrated. And this week, I kept feeling like I must be doing things wrong because they felt so easy...but I was doing them all right! It clicked, and it's so cool. My sweet instructor was like, "I said a little prayer before you got here, after last week..." and it's all good and we can laugh about how my mind rebelled last week because of how well things went today! I kept thinking of a video I'd seen years ago that made me laugh so much...
Something I noticed when re-watching this today was the teacher saying, "It's ok if your shoes aren't doing it. Just don't worry, ok?" toward the end of the video. I'm glad she says it (though I wish I trusted that she meant it more, for poor Ashley's sake) and that's really what I want to tell all of us today - I know we're trying and we're doing our best and that really is enough, and just don't worry, ok?
I love you all,
Ruthie
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